Unaccustomed as I am . . .

Our English language has a number of terms to describe the unfamiliar, which we use in very different contexts: foreign, strange, exotic, weird, abnormal, extraordinary, eccentric, unwonted, inappropriate, indecent, impertinent, improper and insolent, for instance. Of this selection of over a dozen of them, it is noticeable that more than two-thirds are negatives: so many things, so much behaviour of other people, are most aptly described as 'not what we like because it's not what we're used to'.

Not all such terms necessarily mean 'bad': exotic, foreign and unwonted, for instance, are pretty neutral words. Abnormal, eccentric and extraordinary carry warning signals, suggesting phenomena that may perhaps turn out to be a wee bit uncomfortable.

Strange and weird have distinct overtones of discomfort; while improper, insolent and impertinent positively overflow with indignation. But these last three words are merely negatives implying (etymologically, any way) no more than 'stepping beyond the bounds of what is normally acceptable'.

Proper, from the Latin adjective proprius, used to mean 'one's own' - as in the phrase 'personal property'. This word can also mean the characteristic, normal, qualities of something: the properties of the metal quicksilver (mercury) include its liquidity and its capacity to expand in heat. "Talk properly" a parent may say to a small child, meaning "talk the normal way, the way speech is meant to be used ". 'Improper' and 'impropriety' essentially mean little more than "being out of the ordinary" - on the assumption, of course, that our own personal behaviour is the one most suitable to form the general standard.

Insolent comes from two Latin word elements: 'in-' meaning 'not', and the verb 'soleo' meaning to 'be used to'. So insolent talk is talk that we are not accustomed to hear addressed to us. (It all depends what you are used to, of course: the higher you esteem your own station in life, the more you are likely to regard the frank comments of social outsiders as insolent. Whereas your own frank comments to those beneath you are of course perfectly justified - indeed, it is your social duty to make them.)

Impertinence is a similar concept. Latin elements in- = not, per- = throughout, and the verb teneo = to hold, are involved, together signifying "contrary to what is comprised by proper social behaviour". Once again, the subjectivity of the the concept of propriety is at work.

But lastly, consider this recent addition to the terminology of political correctness: 'inappropriate behaviour'. Inappropriate is of course a member of the 'propriety' group, dependent once again on what is deemed to be socially acceptable. Deemed by whom ? The great majority, presumably. It is a pity that this 'standard of decency' has to be invoked and interpreted by our governors, including public servants at many levels, whose own personal standards of decency are not one hundred per cent publicly acceptable. But there it is - can you suggest a better system ?

'Decency' and 'indecency' are also derived from Latin, in which language decentia (from the vb deceo = to be seemly, fitting or proper) meant 'propriety'. The ancient Romans believed in the concept, then; but what we read or hear about life in Rome two millennia ago may well make us doubt how much is to be achieved by appealing to 'standards'. Where standards are not already deeply and widely embedded in the convictions of the people, appealing to them may be a waste of time. And what is decent and applauded in one culture may be indecent and illegal in another.

Unaccustomed as I am . . .